No One Asked For Vagina Beer But It's Here Anyway

Sexy women have been used to sell beer to men since forever. But never before has the suggestion of sex been so...biological. The sinisterly named startup The Order of Yoni has created a beer bottled with what they're calling "the quintessence of femininity": vaginal bacteria. 

That's right. "Bottled Instinct" is brewed with a sample of lactic acid harvested from the nether regions of "the object of your desire"— if the object of your desire happens to be Czech model Alexandra Brendlova.

I don’t know what’s ickier: saying that a woman’s “essence” is contained in her vaginal discharge or that her “instincts” can be “transferred” to a man via sour ale, “turning them into a dance with lovely angel...Giving you the possibility of conversion of a tasty beer into a date with real goddess." Someone could have used a copy editor. 

Extra! Extra! For an investment of 10,000 Euro in their Indiegogo campaign, The Order of Yoni will brew a very special beer (or kefir) with a culture swab from your "girlfriend's" vag. 

It seems highly unlikely that dudes who need a beer to experience the "taste of a woman" have a lady in their life. 

The makers insist that "this insanity will overwhelm your mind." They've got that right.